“Bad Romance”

If you get a chance, check out this article from the Daily Collegian on casual hookups and weenies that can’t figure out why they’re single.
I have a lot to say about this subject.  This is an area where I get really conservative and take a departure from my more liberal peers.  Here is a comment that I posted on the site that the article was published on.
“This article summarizes exactly how I feel.  The author did not suggest that ALL women ONLY want to get married or be in serious relationships, he just noticed that the women complaining about being single - the ones who say they want a 'serious' relationship - tend to be the ones who are so desperate for attention that they will lower their standards and participate in one night stands or FWB relationships in the hopes that it will turn into something more.
I am a young woman, just graduated college, and I will tell you that I have witnessed this kind of behavior from many of my female peers, both those in college and those who were not.  This behavior transcends geographical region, race, backgrounds, and educational levels. 
This author is correct: if you want to be in a serious relationship, don't engage in behaviors that are inconsistent with your claim and that will turn potential partners off from dating you.  I personally think that promiscuity is the #1 turn off and its NEVER cute, whether you are a man or a woman.  Honestly, if you are sleeping around or have a FWB then meet a potential partner, he is not going to think of you as someone he can build a life with.
If you like doing the casual sex thing and don't want a relationship, then good for you - this article is irrelevant, but don't get mad at the author for speaking his mind, and pointing out a trend he has witnessed.  I have always found that the individuals who claim that they are "progressive" or "liberal" and proclaim to be are accepting or tolerant of other's viewpoints are in fact the ones who are the most closed-minded, and won't even listen to opinions from the other side.  THAT, and their assumption that everyone else must accept their lifestyle choices is the biggest problem with society today.
Bottom line is this: it's all about personal choice, but make sure that you are not making poor choices that set you up for failure and ALWAYS be smart about what you are doing, whether its casual sex or sex within a committed relationship.”
That is the abbreviated version of my opinion regarding this matter.
Personally, I am not a fan of casual hookups.  I don’t get the one night stand thing, and I don’t get how you could want to do naughty with someone who has done naughty with everyone else.  Plus I’m terrified of diseases.  And babies.  I don’t get how someone could risk disease+baby with someone you barely know, and someone you are not in a relationship with.  I don’t get the promiscuity being cute thing, I honestly think it is a big turn off for men just as much as women. 
So its safe to say I don’t share the same views as most of my peers on this issue.  I have had several friends put themselves in the ONS situation or the FWB situation or the casual-sex-that-doesn’t-mean-anything-but-I’m-secretly-in-love-with-him-and-I-hope-we-get-married situation, and from my observations it never works out right.
The young ladies put themselves out there as ‘on-demand’ for the guy, whom they would like to be in a relationship with.  In fact, I have seen these women make up entire futures for themselves and the guy…a future that includes them getting married and living happily ever after.  To a guy that just wants naughty time with them…who really could care less about their marriage fantasies.  It’s even worse when you think about the fact that most people that get married really don’t know enough about each other to make that kind of commitment…that’s a big part of the reason that the divorce rate is so high.
For some reason, women in our society have internalized the message that they need to have an obsession with romance.  External pressures from the media and misguided pressure from loved ones both contribute to this.  Everyone is in such a rush to fall into the “perfect relationship” and everyone is so misinformed as to what a good relationship actually entails.  For some, they think that great sex=great relationship.  They don’t realize that communication is the foundation they need.  Others think that they can change others, make them better and then sculpt the partner and relationship into what they want it to be.  They don’t realize the role that friendship plays in finding a good companion.  Some focus on only the materialistic things that they can get from their partner.  They don’t realize that those material items can be gone in an instant, leaving them with nothing.
I don’t know…these really aren’t hard concepts to grasp.  I can only wonder about those who believe the misguided messages.  Maybe they were never taught?  Maybe they didn’t have a good example?  Maybe they don’t have the confidence to set standards and stick to them?  Maybe they come from homes where the parents cheated/divorced/lied/were absent/etc.?
I think it’s sad.  I can’t imagine what it’s like bouncing from one relationship to the next, each time trying to convince yourself that he’s the one, and overestimating the depth of your bond.  Seriously, the signs are all there that he wants it to stay as a booty call, or that he knows he’s got a sucker, or that he’s just feeding you lines, or that he’s got 10 million other girls on the side.  How can you not see them?  Or worse, how can you fall for the same crap over and over.  Yet so many girls do.  And they think they’re better off than everyone else.  They want to give you relationship advice.  I just smile and nod.  Whatever makes you feel good.  You’re not hurting me, you’re just setting yourself up for failure.